Some women in Kayonza District have reported that they continue to face violence from their husbands and other family members simply because they give birth to children of the same sex.
They raised these concerns during the launch of the 16 Days of Activism against Gender-Based Violence. At the district level, the campaign was launched in Mwiri Sector.
Some women who spoke to IGIHE said that gender-based violence still exists, with some victims choosing to remain silent while others are ignored despite being mistreated. They explained that this violence often comes in the form of painful insults directed at women for giving birth to children of the same sex.
Mukandungutse Claudette said that it is God who gives children—whether boys or girls—yet some men continue to mistreat their wives for giving birth to children of only one sex.
She said she knows many families living in constant conflict, where a man decides to have many children in an attempt to get a boy. When he doesn’t get one, the woman is repeatedly insulted and emotionally hurt, and some end up accepting the pain silently.
She said:
“A mother should not be blamed for giving birth to children of the same sex because it is God who gives them. I know many cases where the husband keeps complaining that his wife gave him only girls, constantly telling her hurtful words that make the woman feel guilty for something she didn’t cause. I think the government should increase community dialogues so that everyone understands that all children are equal.”
Bagwaneza Georgine also said that many men in this sector still believe that not all children are equal. She said some men lack patience and end up abandoning their wives to search for boys elsewhere.
Nyirabiziyaremye Solange, a resident of Agahiza Village in Mugera Cell, said:
“I went to school up to Primary Six, then my father stopped me from studying because he said an educated girl will just work and benefit another family. They immediately sent me to herd goats and cows. So I dropped out of school because of that violence rooted in the belief that only certain children deserve certain opportunities.”
Another woman we spoke to, who requested anonymity, said some men still believe that giving birth to only girls brings bad luck.
She said many women who have only daughters are constantly mistreated, especially by men with limited education.
The Kayonza District Vice Mayor in charge of Social Affairs, Harerimana Jean Damascene, said this mentality is harmful and must change.
He said they are aware that some people hold such beliefs, and some men even father up to seven children while trying to get a child of another sex.
He stated:
“The first step is changing mindsets, because whether a child is a boy or a girl, they are a child who must be cared for and has equal rights. Second, giving birth to children of the same sex is not the woman’s fault. Experts tell us that the biggest biological role in determining the child’s sex comes from the man. Girls have the same needs and value as boys, and this mindset must change.”
During these 16 days, local authorities will meet residents at various levels to raise awareness and encourage them to reject all forms of gender-based violence.
